Gossip

A small six letter word that negatively changes lives.

Recently, in a certain group I'm involved in, gossip reigned supreme.

It was fascinating to watch (I mean listen...) as three separate events turned and twisted and grew within just a few hours into a mess of  crime, drama, illness, and heroism. Even more fascinating (and troubling) was how quickly people believed it all.

 It reminded me of a story (By Hans Christian Anderson) I read a very long time ago about a good natured hen who lost a feather while preening one evening. By the end of the story, the chicken's innocent remark about losing that feather is passed on from one bird to another, and turns into a wild story about the suicidal deaths of five lovesick hens who have allegedly plucked all of their feathers in solidarity with the first hen. The story is so enlarged with fantasy, that the original hen, when the story gets back to her, has no idea that the gossip was started by her losing one single white feather.

That's how I felt on Monday when I heard "the news".
 I wish I could share more details, but then...

that would be gossip. :)


L

Forgive

A seven letter word that packs an unbelievable wallop.

Forgive.

I've known people who have forgiven heinous crimes against themselves and their families

and others who can't  won't forgive an unintended verbal jab.

Forgive.

If you can do it, You'll be free.

It's simple. (And yet not so simple.)

Forgive.

It's the other "F" word.



L

Z- Dear Zachary

You have just turned 10 years old. What you don't know is that we have kept a record of many of the funny things that you have said over the years.  Emily has chronicled many of them on her phone and facebook. 

Zachary: "When I was born, my head was with my neck."

Me: "I like the Ewoks"
Zachary: "oh, that's what they're called!! they look like teddy bears!!"
Me: "yeah, they're cute"
Zachary: "but they speak spanish..."

Zachary: My favorite is yellow. I cry just thinking about it.

Zachary: One time I took a nap on my legos. When I woke up they were all stuck to my back!

Emily: The tongue is the strongest muscle in your body.

Zachary: No, your butt is!

Zachary: (Sucks in his belly and counts his ribs) "one, two, three, four, five, six.... six and six is eight!"  (We laugh!)  "Oh it's twelve, I mathed it."

We love you Zachary! Here's hoping that just because you have left the single digits behind you will continue to make us smile.  I'm pretty sure you will.   :)

Auntie Linda

Y- Dear yellow car,

A mustard yellow nova. I'm sure the sticker (when you were new) said something like "golden rod", but you were mustardy, that's all there is to it. You were my mom's car, and I think 4 of the 5 of us learned how to drive at your wheel.
You couldn't quite make it through the 5th teenager. and I've always felt like it was my fault.

In all the years that you belonged to our family, you never had a dent or a scratch... until me. On my way to my first teaching interview, I stopped to visit a friend. I was just stopping to say hi because I was quite early for the interview and she lived right near the school.

As I was leaving her driveway, I did a u-turn in the street. All of a sudden, I heard this excruciating (Interrupting the story to say, that since yesterday's post I am noticing a lot of words I use have an "x" in them!)  loud noise- a horn blaring down on me from just a few yards away. She hit your right front fender and knocked a nasty dent into your lovely yellow paint.

Such a sad day. I called my mom and told her. She wasn't very happy about it, but glad that I was okay.
On the plus side, I made it to my interview and even got the job! (I think the principal was impressed with my ability to stay calm and focused after just having had an accident!)

But here's the confession, little car. You know how first (and sometimes only!) impressions are very important? I have to say that I didn't make a very good one on the girl from the other car  who was involved in the accident.

See, for years I had been trying to break a habit that a picked up in middle school (actually practiced in middle school because I thought it was cool). I was trying not to swear anymore.  Now I had gotten pretty good with it, (going to a Christian college had certainly helped!) but something about the shock of the accident brought it all back to me in spades. That poor girl heard more in the first few minutes than I had said in the last few years! Now, let me just say, I was not aiming these horrid gems her way, just tossing them out in general.
She finally looked at me and told me she didn't appreciate the language and would I please stop.

Awkward.
Even more awkward when I found out that our families knew each other.
I stopped.

And honestly, her comment did more for my rehabilitation than anything else I had tried.

I really remember this quite vividly for having happened almost 30 years ago. I truly hope that girl doesn't remember quite so well. ("No way, Linda? She's a children's pastor? with that foul mouth?")

So anyway, (I did digress, didn't I?) little yellow car, because of the accident, you were never quite the same after that and my little sister, Cindy, did not get to sit behind the wheel of the car that we had owned since she was born.  Just a year before she could drive, we had to say good-bye to our faithful ride.

So, the end of this post, little car, is a sincere apology to you, Cindy, and the girl in the other car.




L

Dear "X",

You my friend, have gotten sort of a bum rap these last few decades. Your lovely symetrical shape has been associated with some not so good experiences in our lives:

Teachers use you to show students which questions they get wrong, using a blood colored pen for emphasis. I don't know why they do this. Surely a light blue or green ink would soften the blow.

You are what they call the spouses that are not longer spouses. Many try to "x" out that part of their lives that didn't work out exactly as they planned.

Your sound starts nasty words like eXam and X-ray. Two words that I personally, would like to stay away from.


But there is good in you.

All those X's and O's that mean hugs and kisses... (how did that get started, I wonder?)

and  memories of games of tic tac toes on the back of church bulletins (or the "dots" game- that was fun too!- but that has nothing to do with you. :) )


And best of all , from the time we are tiny, dreaming of pirates and princesses, you capture our imagination.


You mark the spot where treasure lies.         X




L

W-Dear Wayne,

You surely already know how much I respect you and love you and credit you with so much of what is good in my life. I talk about you and Debbie often and think of you  even more.

You were my youth pastor. You made it all real for me.

You took me on my first foreign missions trip (to the Dominican Republic!)

You married me.  Well, wait, you didn't marry me... you were in charge of marrying Gregg and me. 

You encouraged me.

You challenged me.

If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have gone to Eastern College ("University" now). If I hadn't gone to Eastern, I wouldn't have met Sharon, Kevin, Stephen, Jet, or Amy. If I hadn't met Sharon, I wouldn't have met Scott. If I hadn't met Scott, I wouldn't have met Gary. If I hadn't met Gary, I wouldn't have met Gregg. If I hadn't met Gregg, you wouldn't have officiated at my wedding! 

If I hadn't met Gregg, I wouldn't have met Tammy. If I hadn't met Tammy, I wouldn't have met Kim. If I hadn't met Kim, I wouldn't have been able to work in an awesome Christian group home for two years.

If I hadn't worked in the group home, I wouldn't have met Chuck and Marliss. If I hadn't met Chuck and Marliss, I wouldn't have worked at a Christian social work agency.

If I hadn't worked at the social work agency, I wouldn't have met the foster mom who made my wedding cake and flowers for free!

If I hadn't met Gregg, I wouldn't have moved to North Carolina. If I hadn't moved to North Carolina, I wouldn't have become Children's Pastor at one of the best churches in the world!

If I hadn't become Children's Pastor at one of the best churches in the world, I wouldn't have met all of the absolutely fabulous people that are some of my closest friends.

If I hadn't become Children's Pastor at one of the best churches in the world, I wouldn't have become the children's Pastor of another one of the best churches in the world.

And there you have it.  The 12 degrees of separation that take me from youth group in the 70's right to the here and now.   :)

Thanks for being there when I needed you!

L

V- Dear Valentine,

I don't like your day very much. In fact, it is my second least favorite holiday on the whole calendar. It's not because I have had lots of your days with no beau... there have been very few of your special days that I have been alone. (And I actually enjoyed those!)
Here's the thing. It's too much pressure. Too much expectation. Even after being married for 22 1/2 years to the same man, I don't know what to get him. It can't be too expensive, cuz he's a gotta get a deal kind of guy. It can't be clothes because he picks out his own. It can't be candy, cuz he's trying to lose some weight...and I don't think he probably wants flowers...

When I was dating, it was almost like playing russian roulette. My gift to "him" (whoever "him" was at the time) had to be of the same emotional and monetary value of the one I was about to receive. Who needs that pressure?!

I think the elementary kids have the right idea: let's hand out a little "be my valentine" card with a lollipop attached and leave it at that.  If we could do that, Valentine, that would make me love you more.


L